Jon and Kate of TLC's "Jon and Kate Plus Eight" have made many many mistakes. They have put their family, including eight young children, on reality telelvision. They have shown tremendous disrespect for eachother by the way they treated oneanother on the show and in front of their children. They have blamed the media for their family's problems.
But Jon and Kate's biggest mistake is a mistake that many parents make. Parents that are not on reality telelvision programs for all to see. The mistake that Jon and Kate make, which you may be making, is putting your children first.
There. I said it. I've been dying to say it. Since I started watching the show, not since their marriage began to publicly dissolve, but since I began watching the show about a year ago, this is what ran through my mind over and over again. They are putting their kids first. That will be the death of their family.
Now I know it's so popular to "put your kids first". But it's not going to work. I can assure you of this. Because the most important thing you can give your children, hands down, is a working marriage. So all you wives out there that putting your husbands second in the names of your children are doing your children a HUGE disservice. If you want to be good to your children, then be good to your husband. Put him first. Sleep with him. Pamper him. Cook for him. Be affectionate with him. Doing these things for your children instead of him will hurt them deeply in the long run.
I don't want to pick on the ladies because men too need to put kids second (yep...said it again!). But many times they put those kids first because they are following the wives lead.
I will have more specific blogs on this topic...there is just so much to say-I can only begin to scratch the surface here....
Want to give your kids the most wonder gift that is everlasting? Love your spouse. First. And everything else with grow from that.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
Spring Break
We are staying home for Spring Break. Yes, that's right. I have absolutely no interest in a tan or a margarita. I'm certainly not interested in listening to the crashing waves or hiding my tows in the sand. Well, that is not entirely true. The real truth is that we've NEVER been on spring break with the kids and apparently this wasn't the year to break tradition. But that doesn't mean we aren't going to have any fun.
I am going to do some fun things this week with the kids and most of them do not involve money. Although we are not going anywhere, I'm going to change my usual "chop chop" attitude. Here are a few things that I hope my kids will enjoy.
Chilli Cheese Fritos with dinner (did that one tonight...it was a real hit!)
The words "hurry up" have been deleted from my vocabulary for exactly one week.
Dessert after lunch.
Friends over to play and/or spend the night.
Outings to free/cheap places with picnic lunches.
Checking on all the dogs in our neighborhood to see if they want company.
Cinnamon rolls for breakfast.
Lemonade stand (I've been trying to talk myself into this one. Now that it's published it's official).
Playing outside after dinner.
Less bathing (I know it's gross, but my kids love to skip a bath now and then. They'll think they're getting away with murder).
Television after 6pm. They just realized a few weeks ago that there actually IS programming on in the evenings. They've been dying to watch.
It's not a change in scenery, but it is a change in routine which is so needed after this long winter. I know they'll get a kick out of each of these little things that I've come up with.
And we're bound to have some good memories from our "staycation" if mom can manage to deviate from the usual routine.
I am going to do some fun things this week with the kids and most of them do not involve money. Although we are not going anywhere, I'm going to change my usual "chop chop" attitude. Here are a few things that I hope my kids will enjoy.
Chilli Cheese Fritos with dinner (did that one tonight...it was a real hit!)
The words "hurry up" have been deleted from my vocabulary for exactly one week.
Dessert after lunch.
Friends over to play and/or spend the night.
Outings to free/cheap places with picnic lunches.
Checking on all the dogs in our neighborhood to see if they want company.
Cinnamon rolls for breakfast.
Lemonade stand (I've been trying to talk myself into this one. Now that it's published it's official).
Playing outside after dinner.
Less bathing (I know it's gross, but my kids love to skip a bath now and then. They'll think they're getting away with murder).
Television after 6pm. They just realized a few weeks ago that there actually IS programming on in the evenings. They've been dying to watch.
It's not a change in scenery, but it is a change in routine which is so needed after this long winter. I know they'll get a kick out of each of these little things that I've come up with.
And we're bound to have some good memories from our "staycation" if mom can manage to deviate from the usual routine.
Monday, March 16, 2009
A Few of My Favorite Things
There are so many things that I have been enjoying lately about my children. We all have our "favorite things" and I thought I'd share mine.
Stinky baby toes, you know, the kind that have been in red keds all day with no socks.
Baby's breath....especially a 12-24 month old baby's breath. And especially after nap.
First baskets on the big hoop (had that one yesterday for our 4th).
When the older kids dote on the little ones.
Watching/Listening to them laugh at America's Funniest Home Videos.
When children pray. Especially for people that have died. A long time ago. Yet they keep on prayin'!
The smell of their blankies
Toes. All of them. Even if they are not my kids. I love their pigs.
Good grades.
I love when my children see someone elses baby and they fall in love with them.
I love stories about the kid in class that manages to get himself into trouble every single day. God love him.
Toddlers in helmets. I always think they are just gonna tip over.
I love when they are so small they can only hold a finger, not a hand. And they hold on for dear life.
At the end of each day I think about all of the funny things they did. I try to relay them to my husband and in doing so I get to relive it. In fact, I don't ever go to bed overwhelmed or disappointed about how the day went. I'm grateful for that.
Stinky baby toes, you know, the kind that have been in red keds all day with no socks.
Baby's breath....especially a 12-24 month old baby's breath. And especially after nap.
First baskets on the big hoop (had that one yesterday for our 4th).
When the older kids dote on the little ones.
Watching/Listening to them laugh at America's Funniest Home Videos.
When children pray. Especially for people that have died. A long time ago. Yet they keep on prayin'!
The smell of their blankies
Toes. All of them. Even if they are not my kids. I love their pigs.
Good grades.
I love when my children see someone elses baby and they fall in love with them.
I love stories about the kid in class that manages to get himself into trouble every single day. God love him.
Toddlers in helmets. I always think they are just gonna tip over.
I love when they are so small they can only hold a finger, not a hand. And they hold on for dear life.
At the end of each day I think about all of the funny things they did. I try to relay them to my husband and in doing so I get to relive it. In fact, I don't ever go to bed overwhelmed or disappointed about how the day went. I'm grateful for that.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Daylight Savings
Has the time change sucked for you as much as it has for me? I don't get it. I simply don't get it. I was perfectly content when daylight savings came well into spring...April or May, wasn't it? Now I'm just irritated and I'll tell you why.
"Springing" the clocks forward the 2nd week of March is NOT good for the average structured family. And here is why. BECAUSE CHILDREN ARE STILL IN SCHOOL! They can't stay out past dinner even though the sun is still up because they have to do homework still and get in bed in order to get up for the school day. Now that DST is in effect, it is difficult for children to fall asleep because it's either still light out OR it has only been dark a short while and their bodies havn't adapted. Here's an example. My 4 year old goes to bed at 6:30 (he's an early bird and doesn't nap). When we put him in bed he's confused because it is still light out. And he doesn't fall asleep easily like he normally would...it now takes a good 30-40 minutes until he is out, yet he gets up at the same time everyday, thus shortchanging him on sleep which we all know brings on a world of hurt for everyone. Same story for my 7 year old twins...can't seem to fall asleep yet that alarm still goes off at 6:45am. They have been in tears each morning because they are so tired. And not tired because they were able to stay outside playing...for one thing, they have school so must be in bed, but also it's too darn cold! It's 32 degrees today. So it won't get dark until 7:00 tonight. Whoopee. We can't enjoy it anyway.
Also, I like to run in the mornings. And I'm not one of those die-hard runners that can run when it's pitch black and sleeting. Here's the deal. I can run in the cold. I can run when it's dark. But I can't run when it is cold AND dark. The morning temps this time of year are typically in the 20's but it has gotten to the point where it's light by 6:15 so I can get out the door and not feel like it's 2am. But all that changed with DLS. So now my kids are crabby and I'm not getting in a workout. This is not the way to start a today.
I realize that lots of energy is being saved now that DST is so early. I just wish they had consulted me first!
"Springing" the clocks forward the 2nd week of March is NOT good for the average structured family. And here is why. BECAUSE CHILDREN ARE STILL IN SCHOOL! They can't stay out past dinner even though the sun is still up because they have to do homework still and get in bed in order to get up for the school day. Now that DST is in effect, it is difficult for children to fall asleep because it's either still light out OR it has only been dark a short while and their bodies havn't adapted. Here's an example. My 4 year old goes to bed at 6:30 (he's an early bird and doesn't nap). When we put him in bed he's confused because it is still light out. And he doesn't fall asleep easily like he normally would...it now takes a good 30-40 minutes until he is out, yet he gets up at the same time everyday, thus shortchanging him on sleep which we all know brings on a world of hurt for everyone. Same story for my 7 year old twins...can't seem to fall asleep yet that alarm still goes off at 6:45am. They have been in tears each morning because they are so tired. And not tired because they were able to stay outside playing...for one thing, they have school so must be in bed, but also it's too darn cold! It's 32 degrees today. So it won't get dark until 7:00 tonight. Whoopee. We can't enjoy it anyway.
Also, I like to run in the mornings. And I'm not one of those die-hard runners that can run when it's pitch black and sleeting. Here's the deal. I can run in the cold. I can run when it's dark. But I can't run when it is cold AND dark. The morning temps this time of year are typically in the 20's but it has gotten to the point where it's light by 6:15 so I can get out the door and not feel like it's 2am. But all that changed with DLS. So now my kids are crabby and I'm not getting in a workout. This is not the way to start a today.
I realize that lots of energy is being saved now that DST is so early. I just wish they had consulted me first!
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Getting out the Door in the Morning
I get this question all the time: "How do you get out the door in the morning?" It's usually followed by something like "I can't seem to get out the door with 2, how do you do it with 5?" Well the answer to that is simple: I plan ahead.
Now weekdays and weekends are drastically different in terms of "getting out the door" and certainly each week night faces it's own challenges, so let's start there. On a weekday morning we generally leave the house at around 7:30 am...well, my husband or myself often get a run in before that, but let's just talk about the kids. The trick is preparing the night before. So to get out the door by 7:30 am, and not being a morning person, I do as much as possible the night before. So, clothing for everyone is layed out the night before. Lunches...including dad's, are made the night before. Homework is put in backpacks and papers are signed the night before. All showering for the kids is done the night before. Seeing a pattern here? So the only thing the kids need to do in the morning before school is get dressed, eat breakfast, comb hair and brush teeth. That's it.
Now throw a baby into that mix and it is a bit more challenging. When you have a baby at home as well as children that need to "be" somewhere it takes two. Yes, it works best when dad can pitch in a little more than usual and fortunately for me my husbands schedule allows for that (he is self-employed). But once your baby is getting up in the morning at a predictable time, you should have no trouble getting where you need to go. Just add packing the diaper bag to your list of things to do (drumroll please...) the night before.
Now there is one more piece to the getting out door puzzle I should mention. I generally do not shower first thing in the morning (remember, I'm NOT a morning person...can't do the 5 am workout followed by 6 am shower). I shower at night once the kids have gone to bed...it helps me relax and honestly, I feel so filthy by the end of the day that a good rinse is necessary! So I do give my kids full attention in the morning. I found that when I was trying to get myself showered and ready at the same time the kids were preparing to leave for the day it was disastrous! Not that they needed my help dressing per say (any child above 3 can dress themselves in a timely manner....more blogs on that to come) but knowing that I am available to them is huge. And you'll find that if you are available too, and not rushing around yourself, your kids will be much less stressed out in the morning and they will have a better start to their day.
Having trouble doing all your tasks the night before? Enlist help. I have found that husbands are more than willing to help especially if you are clear about what you need. Sometimes us moms try to do too much on our own so that it's "done right". You can double check the lunches and diaper bag in the morning if you have to. Now go take a bath.
Now weekdays and weekends are drastically different in terms of "getting out the door" and certainly each week night faces it's own challenges, so let's start there. On a weekday morning we generally leave the house at around 7:30 am...well, my husband or myself often get a run in before that, but let's just talk about the kids. The trick is preparing the night before. So to get out the door by 7:30 am, and not being a morning person, I do as much as possible the night before. So, clothing for everyone is layed out the night before. Lunches...including dad's, are made the night before. Homework is put in backpacks and papers are signed the night before. All showering for the kids is done the night before. Seeing a pattern here? So the only thing the kids need to do in the morning before school is get dressed, eat breakfast, comb hair and brush teeth. That's it.
Now throw a baby into that mix and it is a bit more challenging. When you have a baby at home as well as children that need to "be" somewhere it takes two. Yes, it works best when dad can pitch in a little more than usual and fortunately for me my husbands schedule allows for that (he is self-employed). But once your baby is getting up in the morning at a predictable time, you should have no trouble getting where you need to go. Just add packing the diaper bag to your list of things to do (drumroll please...) the night before.
Now there is one more piece to the getting out door puzzle I should mention. I generally do not shower first thing in the morning (remember, I'm NOT a morning person...can't do the 5 am workout followed by 6 am shower). I shower at night once the kids have gone to bed...it helps me relax and honestly, I feel so filthy by the end of the day that a good rinse is necessary! So I do give my kids full attention in the morning. I found that when I was trying to get myself showered and ready at the same time the kids were preparing to leave for the day it was disastrous! Not that they needed my help dressing per say (any child above 3 can dress themselves in a timely manner....more blogs on that to come) but knowing that I am available to them is huge. And you'll find that if you are available too, and not rushing around yourself, your kids will be much less stressed out in the morning and they will have a better start to their day.
Having trouble doing all your tasks the night before? Enlist help. I have found that husbands are more than willing to help especially if you are clear about what you need. Sometimes us moms try to do too much on our own so that it's "done right". You can double check the lunches and diaper bag in the morning if you have to. Now go take a bath.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Back to Basics: Clothing
So this economy is really throwing a wrench into my shopping habits. My kids wear uniforms to school, so I generally don't have to spend a lot of money on clothing...they only need so much. But I am guilty of going a little overboard during the summer. I shop all the clothing parties and manage to spend more than I intend. But of course I am always happy with what I end up with.
This year is a little different. I simply can not spend that kind of money. The problem is, I still desire to have unique, cute outfits for my children, especially for Janie who will be two this summer. So I have really been searching for clothing that is really really cute but is also really really reasonable.
And I found it! A friend told me about his website which you may have heard of. It is http://www.etsy.com/ and they have fabulous vendors. Some are more reasonable than others, but all offer really unique things from adorable aprons, to hand-made kids hats to clothing. I happen to find a vendor that sells clothing...and I like simple styles, like A-line dresses for girls and John-Johns for boys...but I'm really picky when it comes to the fabric. So I contacted this etsy seller named Davina ("toddler tailoring" is her brand) and she is going to sew a few outfits for me. And the best part is she is charging approximately $15 an outfit...I am supplying the fabric. But I was able to find fabric for around$5 a yard that I love! That is $20 for a custom outfit. I'm sorry, but you simply can't beat that.
All you have to do is a little bit of investigating and I'm tellin' ya, these deals are out there. Just like you and I are looking to save a buck or two, other people are trying to make the same ammount. Feel free to contact Davina yourself on her Etsy sight or email her at www.toddlertailoring.com . Happy shopping.
This year is a little different. I simply can not spend that kind of money. The problem is, I still desire to have unique, cute outfits for my children, especially for Janie who will be two this summer. So I have really been searching for clothing that is really really cute but is also really really reasonable.
And I found it! A friend told me about his website which you may have heard of. It is http://www.etsy.com/ and they have fabulous vendors. Some are more reasonable than others, but all offer really unique things from adorable aprons, to hand-made kids hats to clothing. I happen to find a vendor that sells clothing...and I like simple styles, like A-line dresses for girls and John-Johns for boys...but I'm really picky when it comes to the fabric. So I contacted this etsy seller named Davina ("toddler tailoring" is her brand) and she is going to sew a few outfits for me. And the best part is she is charging approximately $15 an outfit...I am supplying the fabric. But I was able to find fabric for around$5 a yard that I love! That is $20 for a custom outfit. I'm sorry, but you simply can't beat that.
All you have to do is a little bit of investigating and I'm tellin' ya, these deals are out there. Just like you and I are looking to save a buck or two, other people are trying to make the same ammount. Feel free to contact Davina yourself on her Etsy sight or email her at www.toddlertailoring.com . Happy shopping.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Back to Basics: Meals
I believe that many families will in fact benefit from this economy. Of course I'm not referring to those whose lives have been drastically altered due to job loss or losing their homes. They are in a terrible state and my heart goes out to them. I am talking about those of us who are going back to basics: the type of family life that is simple, inexpensive and fulfilling.
A generation ago, most families were this way. Meals were prepared and eaten at home. "Entertainment" consisted of charades, game-show television and playing outside past dark. Toys were gifts saved for special occasions such as Christmas and birthdays and not weekly occurances. This economy has forced many of us to re-embrace this back to basics lifestyle, my family included. Although I pride myself on keeping things simple, I have to admit that looking back on the past year I have strayed a bit from this lifestyle.
I am proud to say that not only am I re-embracing it, I actually LOVE it! It's so fun to be so simple. For example, we have cut our spending in all the obvious places, perhaps the biggest was eating out. And I do love to cook and feel like I am actually cooking constantly. We probably ate out 2-3 times a week. And I'm not talking 2 or 3 dinners a week...I mean any meal not prepared by me in the kitchen. So ordering in a pizza on a Friday night...that's one. Bagels and coffee on Sunday morning...that's two. And sometimes my husband and I would get carry-out after the kids were in bed, three. So nothing outrageous, but it sure adds up. Quick.
Well, not only did we completely eliminate this 3x per week eating out, we ate no lunches out. So no Subway, Quizno's or any other type of lunch for my husband. He brings his lunch daily. Oh, and we bought a coffee maker so he brings his coffee too instead of buying it every morning.
It is really entertaining to see how much money we have saved...and it's just not that big of a deal to prepare 3 more meals per week. In fact, on Sundays I am making a "big" breakfast including eggs, bacon or sausage and English muffins. WAY better than bagels!
Guess how much we saved the first month by eliminating those 3 meals a week, the coffee and the lunches? Over $500.
And here is the best part. My husband and I both have birthdays in February, so we do one special occasion dinner and incorporate Valentine's day into that. We went to a great restaurant. And since it had been so long since we had eaten out, we savored every bite. Every single one. It was so delicious. It made it so much sweeter when you don't have it so often. We're already looking forward to next February!
Back to basics is going to be a reoccuring theme in this blog. Look for the next Back to Basics to be for all you clothes horses out there....I have some really cool tips!
A generation ago, most families were this way. Meals were prepared and eaten at home. "Entertainment" consisted of charades, game-show television and playing outside past dark. Toys were gifts saved for special occasions such as Christmas and birthdays and not weekly occurances. This economy has forced many of us to re-embrace this back to basics lifestyle, my family included. Although I pride myself on keeping things simple, I have to admit that looking back on the past year I have strayed a bit from this lifestyle.
I am proud to say that not only am I re-embracing it, I actually LOVE it! It's so fun to be so simple. For example, we have cut our spending in all the obvious places, perhaps the biggest was eating out. And I do love to cook and feel like I am actually cooking constantly. We probably ate out 2-3 times a week. And I'm not talking 2 or 3 dinners a week...I mean any meal not prepared by me in the kitchen. So ordering in a pizza on a Friday night...that's one. Bagels and coffee on Sunday morning...that's two. And sometimes my husband and I would get carry-out after the kids were in bed, three. So nothing outrageous, but it sure adds up. Quick.
Well, not only did we completely eliminate this 3x per week eating out, we ate no lunches out. So no Subway, Quizno's or any other type of lunch for my husband. He brings his lunch daily. Oh, and we bought a coffee maker so he brings his coffee too instead of buying it every morning.
It is really entertaining to see how much money we have saved...and it's just not that big of a deal to prepare 3 more meals per week. In fact, on Sundays I am making a "big" breakfast including eggs, bacon or sausage and English muffins. WAY better than bagels!
Guess how much we saved the first month by eliminating those 3 meals a week, the coffee and the lunches? Over $500.
And here is the best part. My husband and I both have birthdays in February, so we do one special occasion dinner and incorporate Valentine's day into that. We went to a great restaurant. And since it had been so long since we had eaten out, we savored every bite. Every single one. It was so delicious. It made it so much sweeter when you don't have it so often. We're already looking forward to next February!
Back to basics is going to be a reoccuring theme in this blog. Look for the next Back to Basics to be for all you clothes horses out there....I have some really cool tips!
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